Monthly Archives: January 2013

Slash or Burn

I asked the doctor for a referral to a dietician. He offered me surgery. Dude, I thought, I’m not that bad, surely. Does a size 20 actually need surgery? Are you crazy?  “No, thank you.” I said, appalled. A relative-by-marriage of … Continue reading

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Identity Theft

Today’s dispatch is brought to you by Our Lady in the Bathwater. Today I attended a course on ‘presentation skills’. Megamind said the difference between a villain and a supervillain is presentation, and as I have plans for World Domination it … Continue reading

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Comfort Eating

This is a wagon. Three guesses for what’s happened – what I have done after three weeks of being strict. It’s my fault, no-one else’s. I take responsibility for falling off it (gosh, given the game away, there) and it is … Continue reading

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Full-on Full English

Rule #1: Eat a good breakfast. But one like this? This is known as a ‘Coronary Special’ or a ‘Gut-Bust’. Real name: Full-English Breakfast. And according to an article I read recently, you can have this on a nutritionally biased, … Continue reading

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Food Police

Live-to-eat people, people like me, love food. We love fat, salt, sugar, good, home made bread slathered with slices of chilled, salted Normandy butter. We love a slab of rib eye, rare, with freshly made, buttery hollandaise. Some of us … Continue reading

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Call me sludgebelly

Rotund. Rubenesque. Slightly fuzzy around the edges. Call it what you will, it doesn’t escape the truth: Fat. Obese. Size 20 and 19 stone of the wobbly stuff. Compared to some, that’s not too bad, but for the majority, for … Continue reading

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